Nesting and Changes

It has been a whirlwind of changes around here lately, both good and bad. We anxiously wait to hear news of a possible promotion for Jason while we have been completely reorganizing and rearranging the house.

This past weekend we emptied our large front closet and storage shed and went through everything, only putting back in what we had to have.  Everything else is being held back for a church garage sale in April.

This is also in preparation for moving my washer and dryer from my kitchen, to our large front closet and having an actual bona fide laundry room.  : ) 

In place of the washer and dryer I will have more counter top and some simple shelves covered by a curtain.  I hope to chair before and after pictures with you. 

Besides that we are steadily decorating the children's room. It has never really had a theme and what better time to make that concrete than before a new baby gets added?
We have decided on a rustic Americana theme with red white and navy.  It's as unisex as I could get seeing as how little girl will be staying with her big brothers for several years, until we can add another room on. 

We have relocated all of the children's toys into the den/family room.  That is where we all spend the most time and it just made sense.  Clean up is far easier now that the boys don't have to haul the toys back and forth from the den to their room, just dump everything is some old trunks we have in the den. 

This also leaves their room clean, clutter free and safe.  Yes, safe. If you are a mom you know all to well how dangerous a lego, hotwheel or GI Joe can be left out on the floor.  You go to check on the kids and the next thing you know is your doing the one legged stork hop and falling into a book case.....its tragic. 

We have a fabulous church family who has lent us a nice crib and the boys have their double on bottom single on top bunk beds.  We figure we can fit a few more kids in their before we are at maximum occupancy ; )

I have set myself to learning to keep house better and so far the schedule and techniques I have learned are working marvelously.  Will have to post again about that.

Updates and more

*We found out I was pregnant again for the 4th time this fall and am now at 21 weeks.  It was a surprise, coming only a few months after my miscarriage. We are amazed at HIS blessings! Also, we are 90% sure this little one is a girl and will have another sonogram to confirm.  : ) Due date June 24th.

* My 27th birthday is this next week.  I never thought about being this age and it feels weird. 

* We took a trip to sea world in December and it was an amazing Christmas present from family.   Will post pics soon. 

* We have been struggling with disciplining our strong willed 4 year old.  I can't recommend "To Train Up A Child" enough.  Please ignore the bad press and read it for yourself. I do not stand behind the Pearl's theology but their child training tactics are based in scripture, common sense, and effective. 

* Homeschool has already begun.  And I hear what your saying, "there is no need for formal school at 4 years" But a busy Jacob is a well behaved Jacob.  I move at his pace and he is thoroughly enjoying phonics and science at this point.  Will post more about this later. 

* With pregnancy sickness and exhaustion I have been struggling to keep the house going and have backed out of all activities outside our home. 

* My grandmother is moved out and being cared for by people I chose for her..  She is undeniably not saved and a danger to our children.  We pray for her but that is all that seems to be effective at this point in time.  At 101 she doesn't have much time left so I would appreciate any prayers sent up for her.

* We have begun a new path in life, paying more attention to what we eat and use on our bodies.  We have begun using essential oils for health purposes and all natural body products.  We eat more healthy and  I cook from scratch a lot more.  I will have a separate post for this as well. 

New posts coming soon.  Have so much to write down, so many thoughts to think through. 

Its Been A While

Thank you so much for your encouragement since I have been away.  Life has become a whirlwind and recent events have pulled me away from blogging.

While I am not one to boo-hoo on the blogosphere I feel that i must share how God touched our lives this July.

I found out I was pregnant with blessing number 3 in May.  We were so excited! But I knew something wasn't right - very little morning sickness.  Yes, I know each pregnancy can be different but still, it just never set well with me.  Week 10 - the midwife couldn't find a heartbeat.  But we didn't worry too much because they couldn't find one with Mikey either at 10 weeks.  It is a doppler afterall and the little stinkers like to hide from it.
 On the night of July 4th I was 12 weeks and started bleeding.  I was shocked.  I was terrified.  And Jason was out on call.  I hurriedly called him- no answer. Odd.  Again and again I called, sobbing now and fearing the worst. Jason always answered his phone, why not tonight? I felt lost and alone.  I put the kids to bed and then, only then, did I fall to my knees and asked God "Please don't let this be happening!"

But there was my mistake.  Running to my husband is not bad in itself, but where I should have ran first was the cross. 

I can't accurately describe what I felt as I prayed.  It was like a wave of calm washed over me, a peace.  It was like God told my heart "I love you, you are losing this baby, don't be afraid".  And I knew, I knew the baby was already gone.  I trusted God, not because I wanted to, but because the Holy Spirit led me to.  I opened my bible and listened to hymns.  First one that came up was "You Are My Hiding Place" by Selah.  I wept.

And then...Jason got my messages and called me back and then rushed home.  I have no doubt that this was orchestrated by God, wanting me to learn to lean on Him.

Wanting to know what had happened I called my midwife the next day and an ultrasound was scheduled.  A horrible experience.  The tech, after performing the ultrasound, informs us that she can't tell us anything, that we would have to wait for the doctor to tell us.  But we knew.

All day we wait, but the process has already begun I am in physical pain, but the worst is my heart.  My heart aches.

That evening we find out that the baby was lost at 6 weeks, my body was just now catching up and that they couldn't rule out the possibility of it being an ectopic pregnancy.

Closure.

We named her (of course assuming she was a she).  It felt wrong not to.  She was a life, afterall.  So we named her after my late grandmother who was very dear.  Vada Ann Holder.


It seems like it happened so long ago.  Jason was my wonderful supporter during that time, I am so blessed to have him and love him so.  I thank God for him and our wonderful church family, many who have been in similar circumstances.  They were there with hugs and prayers, how amazing is the body of Christ!


And we remain strong in our belief to trust God in this area.  Who are we to think we can control life?

We are trusting God, He is the Author and Finisher of life.  May this bring Glory to His Name.

What to do?

What to do with difficult people?  (by this I mean non-believers who are hateful, spiteful or otherwise "difficult" to converse with or be around)

I know the first thing is to pray, which I have been doing with fervor.  But how do you deal with them, I mean day to day, the nitty-gritty stuff. 

I know that we aren't to call non-believers our friends or socialize with them. 2 Corinthians 6:14
Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?
But what about when its a family member? One that you are obligated to take of, not by simple morality but by Timothy 5:8.
But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. 

I know that I can not know someone's heart, I cannot know if someone is saved.  But God's word tells us we will be able to tell a believer by their works (not to say they are saved by works, they are saved by faith, but works are a fruit of their salvation).

I try to separate all other bad influences from our household.  Most come to us via entertainment but some through people that we no longer cultivate friendships with.  My question is: Am I required by God's law to cultivate a relationship with a person, even though they are not a true Christian (as far as we can tell) and are not what we would consider a good influence for our family IF they are a relative whom we must care for?
Or, are we obligated, as we currently believe, to tend to their earthly needs as best we can while fervently praying for their salvation and God's mercy for their deeds?

This questions sounds simple but then you complicate it with: Do you take this person to church with you? Even though you do not relegate yourself or your family to spending that much time with the person because of their actions any other time?  Is this a point where you "die to self" and take them as a ministry to the lost?  What if they have an alternate place of worship that they may attend (however worldly, useless it may seem)?

Can you sense my exasperation? 

If asked what we feel led to do the choice is clear.  I will be certain that person is cared for, that all of their needs are met.  But do not feel "led" in anyway to have them near my children or self again.  Prayer I believe is our biggest tool in this situation. 

And although I should not care what the outside world thinks of the situation, it worries me that our fellow believers in Christ may see our distancing, our unwillingness to participate in worship with this person (even though their worship is a farce) as a deliberate act of selfishness on our part. 

So, my question is : what to do? 

Today

Today I am tomato staking.
Today I am praying instead of getting angry when I have to separate a fight for the 100th time. 
Today I am reading the Bible and praying over Jacob when he loses his temper and when Mikey is determined not to obey. 
Today I won't cry when I repack my maternity clothes. God saw fit to take her home and I can't begrudge him for that. 
Today I won't waste my time reading about how other housewives can do it better when I should be taking care of my own.
Today I will have everything done my husband has asked me to do.
Today I will consider deleting my blog.
God is helping me today because He knows I need it. Today I am clinging to the cross.

I have no title....

I really don't......all the creativity I once had has left me. 

First, I thought I would include a link to Konbit Sante, due to a request I had. In my last post I talked about getting together with some ladies and making birth kits for Haitian women.  It was an amazing opportunity to give babies and mommies a healthy delivery.   The website it was featured on is Craft Hope, a very interesting organization, all you crafters out there should check it out!


I am very happy to report that the tomatoes are in the ground and are flourishing.  It just took us moving back into the city to be able to plant a garden....go figure.  I went a little plant crazy but was careful when choosing which varieties would do best and Jacob is such a big helper now he helps me water everything. 

I feel a little like this person when I think of spring....

I never thought I would be excited about spring cleaning but I am so ready to start on it next week!  I'll do another post about that, but would love to know y'alls tips on spring/thorough cleaning.  : )

This week has been spent recooperating from my parents visit.  Does anybody know what I'm talking about? 
The visit went really well though, we all had fun and enjoyed it.  My parents even went to church with us...again.  That is the second time I remember my parents going to church...ever.  Glory be to God for His amazing works!

Getting back in the groove of things since Sickness 2011 hit us for 3 weeks.  I am LOVING my new routine, so much so that I've had no problem sticking with it, a post will be coming tomorrow on that.  : )

And finally, I'll leave you with this picture as we say good-bye to winter and hello to spring!

February 2011

 God Bless,

Why I Haven't Been Here

Otherwise entitled: My List of Excuses.

1)We all got sick with a horrible virus (except my husband who waited on us and took care of the house, I love that man!)

2) have been going to routine Dr. checkups with my grandmother. Kind of creepy since I haven't been to a Dr. since Jacob was about 6 months.

3) Trying to get a solid routine set in place, and let me tell you ITS NOT WORKING! Its amazing how much being in a different house can throw you off.

4) We've been spring cleaning/organizing a garage sale.  This should only take us, I don't know, until next summer.....

5)Jacob and I have been doing "tot school".  Because a bored Jacob morphs into Tasmanian Devil Jacob. We've been making letter crafts and reading library books.  It all feels very "homeschool like"  and I am enjoying it. 

5) Jason and I had a talk this past Sunday because I was having a "bad morning" and threw a temper tantrum.  As embarrassing as it is to admit that, I think its important that I do.  So now, My husband has said that Saturday is officially "Get Ready for Sunday-Day" so future melt-down, hissy fits can be avoided. Ahem.

6) I was involved in a charity project to make birth kits for midwives in Haiti.  I had some friends over and everyone pitched in.  We made 18 kits!   I thoroughly enjoyed having people over and hope to do so again soon. 

So  there are my excuses, and now for my goals. 

- Jason wants to go to church Wednesday and attend Sunday School as well as service on Sunday........every week.  Yes, I know I only have 2 kids (3 if you count my grandmother!)  but it is hard work especially since I have no idea what I'm doing.  So I will be planning how to make that go more smoothly. 


- Exercise.  Ick.  I know I'll never look like 130 lb me but I would like to work on being more healthy. 

-Working on meek and gentle spirit, controlling anger and thinking joyful thoughts.  Man, that's work all on its own.

-Implementing another bedtime routine.  We get the kids on one and then jason goes on call and everything goes to pot.  *sigh*  i will be in charge of keeping up with the new routine while Jason's away....no pressure there huh? 

Thats all for now, sorry for the rambling.  But if I don't write it down it stays in my head and nothing else will fit.  : )

God Bless,