Monday, February 22, 2010

Introduction

Isn't it funny that the more discouraging our paths in life, the more awe-inspiring the outcomes is?
"But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life.." Mathew 7:13

The path that led me to where I am today was one driven by foolish ambition fueled by feminist and worldly teachings. however, the choices made were truly mine and I hold myself accountable for both the good and the bad.

I was never satisfied. Not with my job, my degree choices (there were many changes), my home or my family. I kept searching for the next thing to make me happy, a better job, a bigger place, a new gadget or more clothes.

I never really knew God until just a few years ago. Before that I only knew of Him as a biblical boogie man who punished those who were bad. my parents had both been discouraged by religion, as I would be after attending a few random services and vacation bible school's.

I am sure God, through his grace, led me to my husband after going through a really bad relationship. But as many of us do, I went to God when I needed him and then turned my back on him when everything was "okay".

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God helped me find my husband but we quarreled often, if I didn't get my way I would stomp my foot to get what I wanted. (Very embarrassing now that I think about it)
I continued my search for happiness through degree and job changes, even the establishment of a family pet business. And then I became pregnant with my son. "Now I'll be happy" I thought. But pressure came from everywhere that I couldn't be fulfilled staying at home with my baby, why, I wasn't even contributing anything. I had to finish my degree and obtain a high paying job, because money is the goal in life, right?

So my new, all consuming goal was our business. I figured it I was going to stay home I needed to find some way to be productive. So as I immersed myself int he feeding and housing requirements of a 100 reptiles and small animals and chased after the almighty dollar, my son grew up. He was there with me, but I was miles away.

Continued- Introduction: Part II

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